


Five Years

by yosaffbridge



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 05:25:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11914134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yosaffbridge/pseuds/yosaffbridge
Summary: Narcissa makes a promise to Remus on her wedding day, to see him in five years. No matter how much time has passed, he will always love her.





	Five Years

**Author's Note:**

> Something I wrote for a fic exchange on LJ many years ago~

It had been years, but when the owl came with the note saying she needed to see him, there was no hesitation on Remus' part – he would go to her. Even if it meant discovering she hadn't remembered, at least the wait would be over and he would know.

She was waiting for him at the place they used to meet in secret, elegant black cloak covering all but her face and a hint of silky blonde hair. Remus forced himself to keep a respectable distance, pushing down the urge to close the gap between them and wrap her in his arms. "What's happened?" he asked, as though they hadn't gone five years without any contact.

"Don't you remember what today is?" Narcissa said shakily, and as she raised her head slightly he saw the tears glistening on her cheeks.

"Of course I remember," Remus replied. He remembered all too well. "Five years ago today was your wedding day. Do you remember the promise you made me that day?"

Narcissa wept.

~

_Remus would have thought Narcissa had never looked so beautiful as she did on her wedding day, but he knew better. She was a breathtaking sight nonetheless, her slender figure emphasised by her fitted gown. Remus would never have been there if she hadn't asked him to be, and he was acutely aware as they stood in a secluded spot away from the eyes of her family and guests that_ his _Narcissa was a mere hour away from exchanging wedding vows with another man._

_"Don't do this," he said to her, knowing it was his last chance. "You don't have to marry him."_

_Narcissa shook her head. "Don't, Remus, please," she said, looking at him with pleading eyes. "This is what my family wants for me. It—it's what I want. Lucius is a good man, and he's going to be very successful." She paused, averting her eyes. "I have to think about my future."_

_Remus felt as though he'd been punched in the gut, though he made no outward sign save a slight flinch. He knew she was right. He never would be able to provide her the sort of life she deserved. "I see," he said neutrally. "Narcissa—why am I here? Why did you ask me to come here?" He knew she wasn't cruel enough to summon him there simply to rub his nose in what he was losing._

_"I had to see you one last time," she said softly, closing the gap between them and lifting one hand to lightly touch his cheek. "I want to memorize this face."_

_Remus closed his eyes briefly at her touch, a surge going through him like an electric shock. "I know you have a mind of your own," he said, resisting the urge to forget what he'd wanted to say and simply kiss her. "Don't let your family dictate your life."_

_The hand touching his face left and then came back just as quickly as she slapped him. "This is my decision, mine! I don't let my family tell me what to do!" she cried, before dissolving into tears, both hands rising to cradle Remus' face. "I'm sorry, love, I'm sorry, this is just so hard…I know I'm doing the right thing, it's just so hard…"_

_Remus did kiss her then, putting all the passion he could muster into it. His hands went to her hips and he pulled her towards him, deepening the kiss as she responded almost immediately, fueled on by the sound of her soft moan. Her hands left his face and her arms wound around his neck as she surrendered to him, opening her mouth to him. Remus wrapped his arms around her, keeping her pressed against him, until he thought his lungs would burst from need of air. "Please, Narcissa," he panted, breaking the kiss finally. "You know you can't do this."_

_The tears were still streaming down her cheeks, and Remus wiped them away gently with his thumbs. "I can, and I must," she said, her voice breaking on the last word, and turned to go, but stopped abruptly as if she'd suddenly had an idea and turned to face him again. "Give me five years," she said, taking one of his hands in both of hers. "I promise if there's a chance, I'll find my way back to you. It doesn't matter what I feel for Lucius. You're the one I love, Remus. Five years." And before Remus could respond, she was gone._

~

Remus was at Narcissa's side instantly as she began to cry in earnest, hands resting lightly on her shoulders. "Narcissa," he started, then realised he hadn't a clue what he ought to say. Was she crying because she'd hoped he'd forgotten?

"I was afraid you wouldn't remember," she said between sobs, her blue eyes locked onto his. "Or that you'd remembered and you'd moved on anyhow."

Moved on? Remus would sooner have allowed himself to transform in a public place. "Never," he said, kissing her tears away gently. "Never."

"Oh, Remus," Narcissa breathed, and Remus didn’t bother to hold back as he kissed her deeply, his lips pressed to hers with the kind of urgency that comes with years of pent-up longing. Narcissa responded to his kiss with equal intensity and Remus knew he wasn't going to stop – he couldn't. His hands went to the fastening of her cloak only to find that hers were already there, and a moment later her cloak was fluttering to the floor behind her. "Please…I—" she started, but cut herself off abruptly and kissed him instead, almost desperately.

Remus' arms wound around her waist, practically lifting her off the ground as he returned her kiss, the world shrinking until it contained only the two of them in the old, deserted house that had once been Remus' childhood home. Remus pulled away, looking at her for an unspoken affirmation before lifting her easily in his arms and carrying her to the nearest bedroom. He charmed away the dust with a wave of his wand after setting her down gently, and Narcissa had already started unbuttoning his trousers as he turned back to her. They helped each other tug off first his clothes, then hers, article by article, stealing hungry kisses at every opportune moment. The sight of Narcissa, naked and ready before him after so many years of not seeing her at all, sent a bolt of desire straight to Remus' groin and he kissed her again, passionately, before guiding her to the bed. "Stop me now, or don't stop me at all," he warned, his voice strained with built-up passion and barely above a whisper.

"God, don't stop," Narcissa breathed, and wrapped her legs around her waist. "All I want is you inside me."

Remus didn't need any further prompting. He settled between her thighs, holding himself up by his elbows, and a twist of the hips later was buried inside her. He couldn't help the low growl that escaped him as he held himself still, allowing her to adjust to him. Narcissa bit her lower lip and wrapped her arms around him. "God – Narcissa–" was all he could manage before he started to move his hips back and forth, the feel of being inside her consuming all his senses.

It took a minute or two, but they were soon back in their old rhythm, moving together as one body, feeling each other's ebb and flow as they slowly built together towards climax. Remus crushed his lips to Narcissa's, one hand diving into her hair as he soaked up the feeling of her being with him once again, finally, after an interminable wait. He wanted it to last forever, that feeling, but after so long without her he felt himself nearing the end already, and broke the kiss to look down at her questioningly.

"It's all right," Narcissa said breathlessly, as though reading his mind. "I'm on the potion."

Her words were like an invitation, and Remus couldn't hold back any longer. He came inside her, his growl louder this time, melting into a groan as he felt the release of five years finally in those moments. He kept moving, waiting for Narcissa to follow him into climax, and he knew she was there as he felt the familiar bite of her fingernails digging into his back. Both of them were breathing hard, and Remus rolled off of her, immediately pulling her to him so that she was settled against his chest.

"These are new," she said absently, her breathing slowing, as she traced one of the many scars on his chest.

"Five years of transformations means many new ones," Remus said, one hand idly playing with her slightly damp hair.

~

_Remus woke the day after the full moon to the sound of whispering voices. He opened his eyes slowly, trying not to move too much. Madam Pomfrey was speaking with someone who was out of his line of vision, and as he was the only patient in the Hospital Wing at the time Remus wondered what they were there for. He knew it wasn't Sirius, James, or Peter – they'd already been by that morning to see how he was and to give him the news of their forthcoming Apparition lessons. Besides, any of them would have simply gone straight to his bed. He couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but the other voice sounded female, and when she finally stepped into view and headed towards his bed, Remus' eyes widened._

_"Narcissa!" he said in surprise, scrambling into a sitting position and wincing as his bruised and cut body protested. "I didn't expect – that is – what are you doing here?"_

_She perched on the edge of his bed, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder to still him. "Remus, please, don't move too much, I don't want you to hurt yourself," she said in a concerned voice. "Last night was surely rough for you."_

_Remus gaped, then tried and failed to come up with a ready response. "I – erm – how do you mean?" he said weakly, slumping back against the wall. "I'm just a bit…ill…probably just need some Pepper-Up Potion…"_

_Narcissa's brow arched. "Really, Remus, I'm not blind," she said. I've noticed how you're always ill or otherwise occupied right after the full moon." She reached a hand out to touch his chest lightly, briefly. "I've seen the scars. I know you're a werewolf," she said softly, meeting his eyes._

_"I'm sorry," Remus said, looking down. He didn't know what else to say. He braced himself inwardly for her reaction, sure she wouldn't want anything to do with him after finding out what he was._

_"I can't say it isn't a shock," Narcissa began, and Remus could see her fingers twisting in the sheet. "My family have a very strong view on werewolves and how they are to be treated, as I'm sure you know." She paused, and Remus almost looked up, but then she continued to speak. "I thought…well, I agreed with them. But Remus, I_ know _you. I know your heart, and I know you would never hurt anyone. Knowing you, and now knowing this, makes me think my family were wrong." She laid one slender hand over Remus'. "This doesn't change how I feel about you."_

_Remus stared down at their hands for a moment, disbelieving. No matter how well he knew someone, he'd always been convinced they'd reject him outright were they to find out he was a werewolf. It had happened before, after all. "It – it doesn't?" he asked, finally looking back up at her._

_"No," Narcissa whispered, shaking her head. "You're still you. And I still love you. I'll always love you." She leaned over and kissed him gently, brushing a stray hair from his forehead. "My cousin knows about this, doesn't he?" she asked after a moment. Remus merely nodded, and she seemed unsurprised at his affirmation. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone," she added, and Remus knew she was telling the truth._

~

They lay in comfortable silence for several minutes, enjoying each other's presence. Remus held Narcissa close, wanting the feel of her warm, petite body pressed against his to last as long as possible. He knew, however, that it couldn't, as much as he wanted it to. There was something that hadn't been said yet, and he dreaded when that moment would come.

It came all too soon, when Narcissa shifted slightly in his arms and broke the silence. "I can't leave him, you know," she said softly, and Remus wondered whether she'd taken the straightforward approach because she thought it might be less painful. It was a knife in the gut, either way. "I – there are obligations, and I have a son to think about. He's the most important thing to me now."

Remus thought fleetingly of Harry, who was out there somewhere and who would never know his brilliant parents. "I had thought as much," he said, reluctant to admit even to himself that he'd known from the moment he first laid eyes on her that evening that she wasn't going to leave Lucius. He didn't dare voice the unspoken truth that hung in the air, the one she wouldn't be bringing up – she loved her husband.

"We can still see each other," she said, rising up on one elbow to look at him. "Lucius is often out of town on business. Draco has a nanny. We can still be together, at least in some capacity." She bent down and lightly kissed one of the scars on his chest. "These past five years have been horrible, not being able to see you, or touch you, or be with you."

"They've been horrible for me as well," Remus replied, "and I can't tell you how glad I am to be with you now." He paused for a moment, taking a breath. "But I can't do this, Narcissa. I can't be the one you keep on the side and run to whenever you've got a window of opportunity. I can't spend my life waiting for you." He closed his eyes briefly, willing the pace of his heart to slow. "I love you more than I can express in words," he said softly, and pressed a finger under her chin lightly to get her to look at him. "I'll always love you. But I can't do this." Unshed tears shone in her eyes, the beautiful blue eyes Remus had been captivated by so long ago, and all she could do was weep.

~

_Remus knew of her, of course, as she was Sirius' cousin, but he'd never actually spoken to her before. She and Sirius didn't speak as a rule – Sirius said she was a little brat who looked down on everyone, and Merlin knew what she thought of him. So Remus had only seen her from a distance until they ran into each other – literally – one fall afternoon in fifth year._

_It had been a busy day, and Remus' mind was on a million things at once as he hurried through the corridors to his next class. Normally, Sirius, James, and Peter would be with him, but he'd just come from Muggle Studies, and none of them had any interest in taking the class. He felt a sharp poke in his chest and looked down to find his Prefect badge was poking him repeatedly, no doubt due to a little manipulation on Sirius or James' part. Remus rolled his eyes and was attempting to remove the badge as he walked when he heard a female laugh not far in front of him. He looked up just in time to see a blonde walking towards him, but facing the other way, waving goodbye to her friends._

_"Look out!" he said, but wasn't able to move in time to avoid the inevitable collision. Both of their knapsacks fell to the floor, contents spilling everywhere._

_"Oh, I'm so sorry!" the girl said, as they frantically chased escaping inkwells and quills. They were so busy gathering books and parchment that they didn't bother looking at each other until they both reached for the same copy of_ Arithmancy Today _and their hands bumped. Then they both looked up at the same time, and both simply froze for several moments, staring._

_One look into those beautiful blue eyes, and Remus knew he was in trouble._


End file.
